the ceiling fan is turned on over the roar of the dying lawn and the leaves fell today. i realized the leaves fell. maybe they fell yesterday. i realized today, though, riding in the car with the window down and the sunlight falling all over the place. the kind that lights up individual hairs all golden and fingers and ears turn to red wax. I don’t understand this place at any other time.

it was in the summer i listened: have we lost ourselves, have we lost ourselves? answer: so where were we going to begin with? we're dwadling like 9 year olds in the midst of a mighty pine forest and we don't know how to shut up about it because no one can decide if we’re winning or losing. Shut up because if you don’t your mom will hear you and make you go inside and take a bath. man just shut up. i have a friend who tells me all about these things, that we shouldn't think in terms of good or bad/winners or losers/happy thanksgiving or anal vomiting to all and to all a goodnight, so persistently.

BUT, conclusions will be lept upon some other day. to the tune of banjos: i want my hammock and my kneecaps under my chin and the way things feel at 68 degrees in orange-tinted november.























































































hummmm...































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